Many of us would rather shock ourselves than sit in silence. No literally. In one set of experiments, participants were asked to sit alone with their thoughts for 6-15 minutes; 67% of men and 25% of women chose to give themselves at least one electric shock instead- even after saying they’d pay to avoid that shock.
And while that sounds far fetched, it reminds me of a family member who ends every night with the TV. It’s how they wind down, a way to keep the stress of the day at bay. As soon as the screen goes dark, the phone comes out. Input to input, one distraction after another. Without something directing their attention outward, the quiet inside feels unbearable.
We begin to feel awkward after just over six seconds of silence. That’s how quickly we reach to fill a pause with noise or distraction. Yet in that brief quiet, clarity waits. When we stop filling the space, something arrives — an idea, a truth, a piece of insight we’ve been too busy to hear.
Most of us go out of our way to avoid silence. A short pause feels unproductive, even uncomfortable. But by crowding out the quiet, we also crowd out awareness. And awareness is the doorway to clarity.
Silence can feel uncomfortable, but that discomfort is also the entry point. When we allow ourselves to pause instead of filling every gap, we touch stillness. Stillness is simply the space we create when we stop adding more. It doesn’t require long meditation sessions. A deep breath before a meeting, a few quiet minutes with your coffee, or choosing not to reach for your phone are all ways of stepping into stillness.
“Everything comes from nothing. For there to be creation, there must first be space.” — Joseph Nguyen
In that stillness, awareness begins to surface. We notice what’s happening inside and around us: the thoughts running beneath the surface, the emotions we’ve been carrying, even the tension or ease in the body. Awareness is information. It is the raw data of our inner world. Without it, we move on autopilot. With it, we start to see patterns we couldn’t see before, what drains us, what energizes us, and what really matters.
Awareness creates the conditions for clarity. Clarity isn’t about having every answer. It is about seeing more clearly what matters most in this moment. Even a glimpse of clarity can reset our direction, help us choose the next step, or remind us of what truly matters.
Clarity is rare in a world that prizes speed and productivity above all else. We are rewarded for doing more, faster, yet often end up circling the same patterns without progress. Stillness, awareness, and clarity interrupt that cycle. They give us perspective. They remind us that the most powerful choices are not made in the rush, but in the pause.
For leaders, creators, and anyone navigating complexity, this is the real advantage. Productivity may keep things moving, but clarity determines whether we are moving in the right direction. Without it, we risk pouring our energy into the wrong priorities. With it, even the smallest action becomes intentional.
Practicing the Pause
Stillness and awareness are always within reach. Even a few minutes of presence can open the door. One way to step in is through our senses:
- Sight: Let your eyes land on something in front of you and give it your full attention. Notice the details you would normally miss — the shades of color, the texture, the way light shifts across its surface.
- Sound: Close your eyes if you can and listen. What’s the furthest sound you can hear? What’s the closest? Let yourself take in the orchestra of noises around you, near and far.
- Touch: Notice the feeling of your shirt against your shoulders, the weight of your body in the chair, or the brush of air against your skin. Pay attention to the textures and sensations you normally tune out.
- Smell: Take a slow breath in. Notice whatever is present — the scent of your coffee, the freshness of the air, or something subtle you hadn’t registered before.
- Taste: Sense the last taste in your mouth — maybe a sip of tea or coffee, a hint of your last meal. Feel your tongue resting, notice any texture or lingering flavor, even if it’s faint.
When we give each sense this kind of attention, the mind begins to quiet. We’re no longer chasing thoughts but arriving fully in the moment. And from that place, awareness comes more easily, followed closely by clarity.
Stillness, awareness, and clarity are simple, yet they change everything. In a world that rewards constant noise and motion, these three open the door to perspective. They slow the autopilot, sharpen what matters and give us the confidence to move forward with intention.
What shows up in the quiet is space. Space for awareness to rise, space for clarity to take shape, space for possibilities we might never have noticed otherwise.
This is the heart of what I call the Inner Edge — the capacity to pause, turn inward, and discover that your greatest advantage begins within. I’ll share more about that in a future piece.
Anchor Questions: Where can I create a moment of stillness today? What arises when I pause? What feels clearer now than it did before?
